Archive for December, 2011

Make 2012 a Better Year

In the humanitarian spirit of trying to help people not look like
morons, I offer this friendly observation. There is simply no way to
look cool while:

  • Riding a Segway. Yes, I know it’s a marvelous invention, but
    face it: you look like a dork.

  • Pushing your dog in a baby carriage. This is even worse if
    you dress the dog up.

  • Riding in the back of a pickup truck. Even if the truck has
    built-in seats like the Subaru Baja (actually this might be worse.
    Who would buy such a thing?)

  • Playing air guitar. Especially if you are with a group
    listening to music and you’re the only one doing it. And if your
    eyes are closed and your mouth is open, you’re pathetic.

And while we’re on the subject of things people should stop doing,
how about if we abandon the clinking of glasses after a toast, at
least when you’re with more than three people? That interminable
reaching across the table to make sure you’ve “clinked” with
every loser in the group is beyond annoying. Raise your glass, smile
at everyone and say “Cheers,” and then drink the damn thing.

Just trying to help.