{"id":218,"date":"2011-12-31T10:04:21","date_gmt":"2011-12-31T15:04:21","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/frees.com\/?p=218"},"modified":"2012-02-14T09:02:12","modified_gmt":"2012-02-14T14:02:12","slug":"make-2012-a-better-year","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/frees.com\/?p=218","title":{"rendered":"Make 2012 a Better Year"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>In the humanitarian spirit of trying to help people not look like<br \/>\nmorons, I offer this friendly observation. There is simply no way to<br \/>\nlook cool while:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>\n<p>Riding a Segway. Yes, I know it&#8217;s a marvelous invention, but<br \/>\n\tface it: you look like a dork.<\/p>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<p>Pushing your dog in a baby carriage. This is even worse if<br \/>\n\tyou dress the dog up.<\/p>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<p>Riding in the back of a pickup truck. Even if the truck has<br \/>\n\tbuilt-in seats like the Subaru Baja (actually this might be worse.<br \/>\n\tWho would buy such a thing?)<\/p>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<p>Playing air guitar. Especially if you are with a group<br \/>\n\tlistening to music and you&#8217;re the only one doing it. And if your<br \/>\n\teyes are closed and your mouth is open, you&#8217;re pathetic.<\/p>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>And while we&#8217;re on the subject of things people should stop doing,<br \/>\nhow about if we abandon the clinking of glasses after a toast, at<br \/>\nleast when you&#8217;re with more than three people? That interminable<br \/>\nreaching across the table to make sure you&#8217;ve \u201cclinked\u201d with<br \/>\nevery loser in the group is beyond annoying. Raise your glass, smile<br \/>\nat everyone and say \u201cCheers,\u201d and then drink the damn thing.<\/p>\n<p>Just trying to help.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>In the humanitarian spirit of trying to help people not look like morons, I offer this friendly observation. There is simply no way to look cool while: Riding a Segway. Yes, I know it&#8217;s a marvelous invention, but face it: you look like a dork. Pushing your dog in a baby carriage. This is even [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-218","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-mikes_rambling"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/frees.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/218"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/frees.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/frees.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/frees.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/frees.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=218"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/frees.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/218\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":228,"href":"https:\/\/frees.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/218\/revisions\/228"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/frees.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=218"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/frees.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=218"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/frees.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=218"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}